But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
