he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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