Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
