Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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