operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
