I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize