I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
