i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
