Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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