PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
