You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
