Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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