Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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