even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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