i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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