In the future we'll all be gay
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
