The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
