Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
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do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
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Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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