Apparently you make a good broom.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize