yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize