We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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