doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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