Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize