She's JV to your varsity
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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