She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
