we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
