covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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