Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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