just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
