I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We are two peas in an std pod
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
