someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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