I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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