Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
