I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
