i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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