he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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