Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....