She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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