Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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