ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
