Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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