Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
