Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

you still trying to smash that chick?

(1-248): View more from Michigan

it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober

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(269): View more from Michigan

We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.

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(216): View more from Ohio

My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(303): View more from Colorado

it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol

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(513): View more from Ohio

Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister

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(520): View more from Arizona

I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.

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(561): View more from Florida

i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together

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