The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....