I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
