She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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