i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
