whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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