Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
