u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
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