i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
