And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize