Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize